march, 2012

Fri, 23 Mar 2012 21:33:00 -0500

We're in the first of two exit rows (to account for his long legs) so he can't recline, though he's all but asleep within 10 minutes of takeoff. The sky outside the cabin window is darkening surprisingly quickly. My right hand is caught between his two hot ones; I type this left-thumbed on my phone. I've got a plastic glass of anodyne but perfect California Merlot, a novel, and a glow of well-being from the 10,000 feet of cabin pressurization and the squeezes the sleeping boy in seat 20F keeps unconsciously giving my fingers.

Tue, 27 Mar 2012 19:23:04 -0700

I dashed off a paragraph's worth of bullet points to my manager today, the least formal quarterly report ever requested of anyone. How is Q1 mere days from over? I've gotten almost nothing done these last three months -- a much-belabored design document mostly shipped; the usual oncall shifts and tickets and Keeping Things Going ™ -- but there's no denying it's been a plateau of a quarter. And I know exactly where the area under the curve of that projected growth went.

There's been the Symphony Chorus, of course: Weeks in a row leaving work on the absurdly early 5:11 shuttle, a sandwich and glass of wine at Arlequin before three hours of singing, down in the basement-level Zellerbach C or up in the chorus balcony of Davies. There's been some seriously seismic shit happening above my pay grade at work -- long walks on the hill above Shoreline Amphitheatre with tea and coworkers, trying to make sense of the situation; one-on-one meetings that require whiskey after; closed office doors and sadly shaking heads and angrily shaking fists. That alone cost me an easy few weeks.

But mostly, there's been the simple fact of having a reason to leave work: A reason who lives a block and a half straight up the hill from me (I can dash between our houses within SLA), who picks me up in the air because he's half again my size and can, whom I just took to Chicago to meet Mom and for whom I flew home early from New York. Maybe he hasn't actually substantially altered my working hours. But right now, sitting at my desk, I just seem to care less. Buds on the trees; magnolias blossoming; English peas already at Bar Jules at our Valentine's Day dinner over a month ago: It's been an early spring all around, la la!

I'll refocus soon, I'm sure. But for now, leave me among the cherry blossoms -- there's always Q2!

all this Šnori heikkinen, March 2012

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